Resolute Square

How to Defeat Autocracy, Root and Branch

Andra Watkins writes: What’s it like to be in a relationship with an autocratic, non-compromising, non-flexible person? Today’s Christo-fascist Republican Party is teaching many Americans about these abusive relationships in real time. Once we defeat them and defeat them and defeat them some more, we’re all going to need trauma therapy.
Published:June 27, 2024
Share

*Andra Watkins is an award winning author, survivor of Christian Nationalism and an expert on Project 2025. Read and support her important work here: How Project 2025 Will Ruin Your Life


By Andra Watkins

What’s it like to be in a relationship with an autocratic, non-compromising, non-flexible person?

Today’s Christo-fascist Republican Party is teaching many Americans about these abusive relationships in real time. Once we defeat them and defeat them and defeat them some more, we’re all going to need trauma therapy.

Tato A. Torres Gilormini, a Doctor of Clinical Psychology and Family Therapist, put together a list of autocratic traits to look out for in interpersonal relationships. I’m sharing those traits today.

Interpersonal Relationships - What are autocratic, non-compromising, non-flexible people like?


  • Authoritarian Approach: They often adopt a top-down approach in relationships, dictating terms and making unilateral decisions.


  • Conflict-Prone: Their lack of compromise can lead to frequent conflicts and strained relationships.


  • Poor Empathy: They struggle to understand or value the emotions and needs of others. This is key and at the center of this Me-Game. A “We'' requires more relational development. 


  • Control Issues: They need to control the dynamics of their relationships, often micromanaging and dictating terms.


In my newsletter “Forced Birth Can Be the Greatest Healing Agent,” I wrote about how Christian Nationalists use the Bible to give themselves a pass on empathy. Because who are they to try to help someone God chooses to punish? If they interfere, that person may never learn the lesson God is trying to teach them. Their punishment may never heal their relationship with God.

I want to expand on Tato’s comments on empathy, because so many on the Left wring their hands at the Right’s lack of empathy. Before I started doing this work, I’m not sure I ever considered how this indoctrination robs people of empathy. And the solution isn’t telling them they’re authoritarian or lecturing them to be more empathetic. We can’t fight fire with fire, especially when it comes to the non-compromising. Being empathetic of those who lack empathy is not submitting, it is sublimating. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/sublimation

Here are several tips for dealing with people who lack empathy from Very Well Mind. I used their tips in bold and tailored the recommendations to this work.

1. Establish boundaries. We know what boundaries look like in our interpersonal relationships. We may restrict time with difficult people, or we may cut them out of our lives entirely.

2. But what about with our fellow Americans? The best way to establish clear boundaries will be to defeat them at the ballot box. At every level of government. In every election. For as long as it takes.

3. Nurture relationships with people who have empathy. You’re here, so you’re already doing that work. Be fed by the hope you get from the work we’re doing together to save democracy. Don’t let them rob you of your joy or keep you from celebrating every success.

4. Don’t seek emotional validation from them. For those who enjoy engaging with trolls, that means stop engaging with trolls. Arguing with trolls is a form of emotional validation. Don’t give them that power. What they’re saying to you isn’t about you; it’s about them.

5. Don’t expect them to change. I think most of us have come to the realization that we will never change the members of this Christo-fascist, white supremacist cult. But we CAN focus on persuading people to vote. We CAN make our case to undecided voters. We CAN encourage more Americans to register to vote. We CAN warn Americans about Project 2025.

6. Walk away if necessary. I’ve ended relationships with so many people over the last decade. It’s okay. You’re not alone. I don’t know what “walk away” means for our democracy, but those decisions are above my pay grade.

7. Try not to take it personally. This one is SO HARD. It’s hard to watch people shrug at suffering; even harder to see so-called Christians inflict pain with undisguised glee. Different tools work for different people but this works for me: I have to answer for MY actions; I’m responsible for MY reactions; when it’s all said and done, I want those things to add up to a positive difference in the world.

What about their authoritarian approach and need to control?


They don’t disguise their authoritarian approach in Project 2025’s Promise 2: Dismantle the Administrative State and Return Self-Governance to the American People. I wrote about that here.

Here are their exact words from Project 2025:

The next conservative President must possess the courage to relentlessly put the interests of the everyday American over the desires of the ruling elite. Their outrage cannot be prevented; it must simply be ignored.
Project 2025, page 9

At every turn, Christo-fascist Republicans ignore the will of voters. They ignore judicial rulings they don’t like. They ignore election outcomes with which they don’t agree. They are clearly and indisputably communicating their authoritarian bonafides. More Americans would be wise to believe they mean what they say and do.

We’ve heard and seen their approach to conflict.


We will hold impeachment hearings for a sitting Democrat Presidentbut we won’t let you mention our candidate’s 34 felony convictions in the House.

We will grandstand and trade personal insults during formal committee meetings; then refuse to apologize.

We will not compromise.


Related

  • "Project 2025 Is Just The Beginning" with Dave Troy
    That Trippi Show

    That Trippi Show

    Dave Troy, publisher of "America 2.0," joins Joe and Alex to look under the surface at what Elon and Trump are doing. What's Elon's endgame - and is there any way to stop it? How Project 2025 is just a small piece of the puzzle - what's "Project Russia" and why is it a MUCH bigger threat? And why do the crypto-bros keep attacking the dollar? And what should the pro-democracy movement do about all of this? Read Dave's work at America 2.0 at https://america2.news/.
    February 21, 2025
  • THE MASS DEPORTATION DISASTER: Trump's Project 2025
    The Enemies List

    Rick Wilson's The Enemies List

    Special guest host Stuart Stevens introduces the topic of today's episode, Trump's disastrous first week and the incoming deportation calamity likely to take place. The story that leads off Chapter 6 of Trump's Project 2025: Up Close and Personal, Mass Deportation Disaster captures the struggles of 12-year-old Alvaro and his mother in a fictional detention center in West Texas. Alvaro expresses his hunger to his mother, who is too weak to properly care for herself. As they navigate the deteriorating conditions of the camp—overcrowded with diminishing food supplies, hostile guards, and a sense of fear from both authorities and fellow detainees—Alvaro reflects on lost friendships and longing for better times. His mother’s health declines as she sacrifices for him, giving him her piece of bread despite needing it more herself. This highlights Alvaro’s growing awareness of their desperate situation. He learns from a friend, Manuel, about possible escape routes and decides to plan his own escape to ensure both his and his mother’s safety. In the second half of Chapter 6, in a parallel narrative, soldier Jake Caldwell describes the chaos of the detention center from his perspective. As he witnesses the overwhelming influx of women and children, he feels the systemic failures of the camp. The environment strips away humanity, leading children to escape in search of freedom. As both narratives unfold, Alvaro attempts to escape the camp, filled with hope for a future where he can see his mother smile again even as Jake grapples with the moral dilemmas of his role in the oppressive system. Their stories intertwine themes of resilience, sacrifice, and the harsh realities faced by both detainees and guards in the unjust conditions of the camp. We'd like to thank all the artists who volunteered their time to make this episode: Mark Ruffalo and Andrea Guidry who read the chapters and others who contributed character voices. Sound design by Marilys Ernst and Jon Moser. Trump’s Project 2025:Up Close and Personal is available on all the podcast apps and at 2025pod.com. We'd like to thank all the artists who volunteered their time to make this episode: Laurie Burke, Leigh McGowan who read the chapters & Audrey Hakes, Joe Walsh, & others who contributed character voices. Sound design by Marilys Ernst and Jonathan Moser. Trump's Project 2025: Up Close and Personal was written by David Pepper and produced by Pepper, Melissa Jo Peltier and Jay Feldman and is a production of Ovington Avenue Productions and The Bill Press Pod. This special series is a joint production by David Pepper and Resolute Square. The book, “Trump’s Project 2025: Up Close And Personal” by David Pepper, is available for purchase at https://a.co/d/adWcJ4S.
    January 27, 2025
  • THE DEPARTMENT OF RETRIBUTION: Trump's Project 2025: Up Close and Personal. Chapter 5
    The Enemies List

    Rick Wilson's The Enemies List

    Special guest host Stuart Stevens starts by detailing the potential horrors to come from Trump's cabinet. From Kash Patel, Pam Bondi and the rest, this is a group specifically designed to carry out the President's unchecked retribution against his political enemies. In Chapter 5, Part one, the fictional characters Congresswoman Louise Getty and Senator Wade Stiller, former rivals, meet at the World War II Memorial in Washington D.C. They reflect on their pasts and express concern over a hostile political climate under Trump’s second term, feeling fear and paranoia about being surveilled and targeted by the government. Their conversation reveals a sense of vulnerability as they confront the reality that many of their colleagues have abandoned principles out of fear. Louise recalls the intense political maneuvering and betrayals leading up to and following the January 6 insurrection. In Part Two, Woody Nuxhall, the newly appointed head of the Treason and Political Crime Section of the DOJ, oversees his zealous young team of prosecutors, eager to pursue investigations and vendettas against political enemies. The group discusses tactics to surveil and undermine former colleagues and opposition figures, planning a strategy fueled by partisan loyalty and vengeance, while embracing a radical transformation of the DOJ's role in politics. The narrative emphasizes the deeply entrenched fear and moral compromise within Washington's political landscape, contrasting the idealistic memories of past sacrifices with the present-day weaponization of governmental power. Overall, the story highlights the erosion of democratic norms, and the personal toll this environment takes on the individuals involved. While these stories are fictional, they are based on Trump's own words and Project 2025. In fact, the New York Times, just last week reported just how Trump would use the Justice Department to go after his enemies. We’d like to thank the artists who contributed their time to make this episode: Richard Schiff and Morgan Fairchild read the chapters and others who contributed character voices. Sound Design by Marilys Ernst and Jon Moser. Trump’s Project 2025:Up Close and Personal is available on all the podcast apps and at 2025pod.com. We'd like to thank all the artists who volunteered their time to make this episode: Laurie Burke, Leigh McGowan who read the chapters & Audrey Hakes, Joe Walsh, & others who contributed character voices. Sound design by Marilys Ernst and Jonathan Moser. Trump's Project 2025: Up Close and Personal was written by David Pepper and produced by Pepper, Melissa Jo Peltier and Jay Feldman and is a production of Ovington Avenue Productions and The Bill Press Pod. This special series is a joint production by David Pepper and Resolute Square. The book, “Trump’s Project 2025: Up Close And Personal” by David Pepper, is available for purchase at https://a.co/d/adWcJ4S.
    January 22, 2025
  • Key Pete Hegseth Takeaways and How You Stop Him
    Of the Pete Hegseth confirmation hearing, Amee writes, "We should be calling it the 'Kavanaugh: The Redux' considering how well Hegseth is able to lie through his smirks, and distract from the real questions at hand with his boisterous Fox News Narratives."
    January 16, 2025
  • THE DEATH OF SCIENCE: Trump's Project 2025: Up Close & Personal
    The Enemies List

    Rick Wilson's The Enemies List

    To start, special guest host Stuart Stevens weighs in on day one of the confirmation hearings and the abomination that is the slate of nominees Trump has put forward for some of the most important positions in the Executive Branch. In Chapter 3, the fact-based fictional story of Dr. Yvette Hardman and JJ Newsom depicts the dismantling of expertise and science-based decision making in the federal government under a possible second Trump administration guided by Project 2025. Dr. Hardman, an experienced infectious disease expert, is removed from her position at the CDC and replaced by JJ Newsom, an unqualified political loyalist with no relevant experience. This reflects Project 2025's plan to fill government positions with partisan appointees rather than nonpartisan experts. The new administration rejects science-based pandemic response recommendations from Dr. Hardman instead prioritizing political and economic considerations over public health. This aligns with Project 2025's directives to limit the CDC's ability to make public health recommendations. The story highlights the Trump administration's hostility towards science and the displacement of experienced civil servants, which Project 2025 seeks to accelerate through measures like the "Schedule F" executive order to reclassify and fire federal employees. Overall, the narrative illustrates how a second Trump term guided by Project 2025 would undermine the role of expertise and independent scientific advice in government, with potentially disastrous consequences for public health and safety. Trump’s Project 2025: Up Close and Personal is available on all the podcast apps and at 2025pod.com. We'd also like to thank all the artists who volunteered their time to make this episode: CCH Pounder, Richard Schiff and Jason Kravits who read the chapters and Omid Abtahi, Tom Nichols, Laurie Burke and Joanne Carducci who did the voices. Sound design by Marilys Ernst and Jon Moser. Trump's Project 2025: Up Close and Personal was written by David Pepper and produced by Pepper, Melissa Jo Peltier and Jay Feldman and is a production of Ovington Avenue Productions and The Bill Press Pod. This special series is a joint production by David Pepper and Resolute Square. The book, “Trump’s Project 2025: Up Close And Personal” by David Pepper, is available for purchase at https://a.co/d/adWcJ4S.
    January 15, 2025